• Home
  • News & Current Affairs
  • Brexit
  • Politics
  • Podcasts
    • The Eamonn Mallie Podcast
    • Eamonn Mallie – Stream Of Consciousness
Facebook Twitter Instagram
Monday, June 5
  • About Eamonn Mallie
  • Published Books
  • Our Authors
  • Get In Touch
Facebook Twitter
Eamonn Mallie
  • Home
  • News & Current Affairs
  • Brexit
  • Politics
  • Podcasts
    • The Eamonn Mallie Podcast
    • Eamonn Mallie – Stream Of Consciousness
Eamonn Mallie
You are at:Home»News & Current Affairs»Opinion»‘I am going to lose a button’
Opinion

‘I am going to lose a button’

Eamonn MallieBy Eamonn MallieFebruary 21, 2012Updated:August 22, 2012No Comments3 Mins Read
Facebook Twitter Pinterest LinkedIn Tumblr Email
Larry king in his trademark braces
Social share:

 

Larry king in his trademark braces

 

You know there are times that you just cannot  get something out of your head. For over twenty years I have had a love hate relationship with braces. I keep thinking about those braces and they keep reminding me of their presence at very inappropriate moments.

Growing up in the countryside all the older men wore braces. In those days braces were always attached to trousers with buttons. With the changes in fashion clip-ons ended up à la mode.

Working on the farm, in an era when indoor toilets were rare, if you were lucky there was a wee ‘lav’ out the back, but it was not uncommon for young fellows like me to hear an elder declare “I am going to lose a button,” (yes the term used was ‘lose’ a button – that should have been ‘loose’ a button). No one said anything but we all knew what was meant as we watched a man cutting hay, threshing or whatever, heading off across the garden or the field to find a discreet spot behind a tree or a rock for a s…. One did not spot any sign of Andrex Toilet Roll being part of his apparel. Oh no!

Without wishing to be too invasive of your space we all knew a fistful of fresh green grass or more commonly, a dock leaf, a common herb growing wild in country gardens, did the job adequately.

Despite my childhood memories of older men being carried along, supported by those gealasacha (braces in Irish) I grew up with a penchant for wearing them in the face of family opposition who repeatedly charged “you  look like an old man dad.” I persevered.

In essence there was a little eccentricity and desire in me to be alternative in wearing those braces even when I was a slimline Jim.

I have a confession however to make about braces. My affair with them has not been fully consummated. Hold on now — I have no intention of giving up on them, but they do test my patience regularly, particularly at some point when I am becoming animated in my cross-examination of some contrary politician, then suddenly, the croc-teeth on my trousers snap! Compromised yes,  but not a disaster. It could be worse.

Spare a thought for the Sinn Féin President: I recall in the wake of his appearance on ‘Larry King Live’ he emerged to face the assembled press in Washington, a clip board appearing nailed to his crotch. Later I queried the background to this weird accessory to be told “the zip on his trousers literally split wide open as he came through the door on his way out.”  Oops… there goes my croc- clip again!

 


Social share:
Previous ArticleEamonn McCann on Eamonn McCann
Next Article Have Dawkins and his atheist friends blown it?
Avatar photo
Eamonn Mallie
  • Website
  • Twitter

I am a regular contributor to discussion programmes on TV and radio both at home and abroad. An experienced political editor and author specialising in Politics, Security and 20th Century Art.

Related Posts

POLITICAL PURGATORY or POLITICAL HELL? – By Brian Rowan 

April 18, 2021

The dilemma facing Unionism on all fronts – By Dave Maley

February 5, 2021

A Referendum on Irish Unity – An Economic Imperative – By Gerry Carlile

October 20, 2020

Comments are closed.

Our Picks

How the killings of two men 25 years ago helped to break the deadlock in the Peace Talks resulting in the Good Friday Agreement – by Mark Durkan

March 4, 2023

Life in politics by Monica McWilliams seen through the lens of former Northern Ireland Assembly speaker Dr. John Alderdice

February 15, 2022

‘The Troubles were just there, part of our normal…’  – By Brian Rowan 

January 26, 2022

The Health System Needs Surgery – by Mark Sidebottom

November 19, 2021
Follow me on Twitter
Tweets by @EamonnMallie
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
About
About

Northern Ireland's home for Independent thought. News & Current Affairs from Northern Ireland. Opinions, The Arts, Sports & more.

We're social, connect with us:

Facebook Twitter
Popular Posts

How the killings of two men 25 years ago helped to break the deadlock in the Peace Talks resulting in the Good Friday Agreement – by Mark Durkan

March 4, 2023

Life in politics by Monica McWilliams seen through the lens of former Northern Ireland Assembly speaker Dr. John Alderdice

February 15, 2022

‘The Troubles were just there, part of our normal…’  – By Brian Rowan 

January 26, 2022
Recent Comments
  • truck headlights on The Unacceptable Faces of the DUP and Sinn Féin – By Eamonn Mallie
  • Annemarie McQuade on West Belfast man SIMPLY wants UVF to publicly acknowledge father’s killing – By Paul Crawford
  • güzellik merkezleri on The Unacceptable Faces of the DUP and Sinn Féin – By Eamonn Mallie
Copyright ©Eamonn Mallie. Designed by Web Design Belfast.
  • Copyright

Type above and press Enter to search. Press Esc to cancel.